Closing Remarks: All Stories Are Unique

Of all the stories in the book I liked Ski Bums the most be cause that is the one I can best identify with. I can not tell you how many times my husband and I talk about opening our own business. We know that owning a business is way more work than working for someone else and just putting your time in and going home, but there is something about knowing that its yours and worth the work and headache. We have dreamed about all kinds of different business that we could open but I dont ever really think that any thing will come of it.

As far as what I learned from the book, I have learned that you do not have to be a very good writer to get published. I hated this book. I can not believe that someone would publish a book about a bunch of people with no direction, I know plenty of people who could fit into this book and believe me their lives are not intresting enough to write about .... and I am including myself. The majority of the people in this book (not all)  have had to choose between a job they hate but make huge amounts of money at, or a job that they would rater have but doesnt pay what they are used to... well boo hoo I dont care. If I were Po I would have left everyone out that didnt make a change for the better, when you read a self help book what good does it do you to know that most people fail at the change they attempt? I am sorry I didnt get something out of this book but it was painful to read, and I usually love to read maybe this just isnt my topic? I did not think that I would like writing a blog but I think I did. Even though I do not think anything in my life or anything I have to say is intresting enough to write about (and I do not think anyone will really read this) I have enjoyed venting on my blog.Who knows maybe I will keep it up after the class is over?

The Appropriate Time Frame

have you ever felt that your life was unbalanced? At some point everyones life is unbalanced. Either to much work or to much play. At this point I have to much to think about so my way of coping with stress is to ignore what I do not want to deal with. I know that solves nothing but sometimes that is what you need to survive. I moved to Ashland 2 days before this semister started. I started the process of buying a house. I just closed on this house a week ago and am planning on moving in next week. However I dont have a clue how long I will even be living there because my husbands work may be taking us back to Louisville. See why I ignore what I dont want to deal with?

I asume that by returning to school that is something I am working for and hope it pays off in the end. I hope it will pay off by me having a new career that I can take anywhere because it does not look like the constant moving is going to end.

I dont know that I have every helped someone when no one else believed in them but how about when they didnt believe in themself? I think that is part of being a good friend and hopefully we all have someone we can vent to, someone who will not tell us to stop dreaming cause its "never gonna happen". I come from the "never gonna happen" kind of family. None of my siblings or my parents have ever done anything that was risky at all. They are all so boring and do not believe in setting the bar very high. Having someone help you work tward a common goal feels so much better than trying to do it on your own surrounded buy people who dont think you can.

Relationships and Family con't

Having to choose, would you choose love over a career? Or opposite?  I think this totally depends on at what point of your life you are in when someone asks this question. How about love of a job that will not lead to a steady career? That is exactly where I was at for at about 15 years. Now that I am happily married, work does not consume my life. Before I worked long hours and was happy to do it. Now I am not willing to give so much to my job because I have better things to do with my time.

 Do we inherit our parent's dreams, fears, and wants? I am not sure about that because as far as I can tell my parents did not have dreams or fears or wants. My father worked and my mother was a stay at home mother(I have 5 siblings) and I do not really think that they ever mentioned wanting another life. We were very lucky that my dad had a very steady job that paid well enough that he could take care of us with little problems. I think he liked his work because he had to be at work at 7 am and he usually left the house about 5am with about a 15 minute drive to work. I think a lot of the men he worked with did this and they all socialized before work. Mostly I think my parents were concerned with making a decent wage and not so much worry about "their lifes work". When I was younger I just wanted to enjoy my job, now not hating it is enough.

Do you believe that many of our fears and misconceptions about our careers stem from our fears and misconceptions of being a parent? I have no idea about this one, I do not have children and have never wanted to be a parent. I do think that most of the reason I never wanted children is because I was the youngest of 6 kids and my parents lifes were BORING to me. We never took family vacations or anything fun. I am nothing like them in the respect that I seriously do not think my mother has been more than 20 miles away from the tri-state in more than 50 years. This is not the life I wanted and this is why I do not have children. I know its not rational but growing up I seen having a family as being tied down and as having zero freedom. I like my life and I do not regret my decision but when I am elderly and in a nursing home I may lol.

Relationships and Family part 1

What do you believe is the point in life? People have been asking this question since time began. My answer is simple, that depends on the person. I do not know the point of life but what is the point of asking this question? We are here, make the most of it. That means different things to different people. To some people this question will convict them to a life of a public servent, (think Chi from "The Lottery Winner") to others it could simply be to live life to the fullest even if it means taking risks.(Nancy and Ross "Ski Bums). To me it must have balance. As I have said before, at this age I do think more about leaving the world a better place and I want to contribute to that but I also need quaility time with my family and am unwilling to give up everything to save the world as are most people.

I am most comfortable and happy when I am enjoying the outdoors or traveling to see new places. I guess I could make that into a career but I am happy to have a career that allowes time for my intrests. I do think it would be a great job to be a forest ranger but I never seriously thought about it.

As far as having to choose between something that I want and something that benefits in the long run havent we all had to do that? I would rather work and make money rather than spend money by atteneding school but that is not going to get me where I want to go. Life is filled with crisis we all have them and usually if we are lucky we all learn from them. This is not to say that I do not enjoy my life...I do very much but we all have our problems and we all always will.

how well do you know yourself?

What motivates me day to day? I used to always look at the big picture, everything that I did was leading up to something. That puts to much stress in my life so now I just try to get through each day. Can a motivation change a plan of action? Yes but I have found that motivation changes over time. Motivation changes often for some people.

While I have returned to school only to make a career change (I am not trying to "find" myself), I have noticed that as I get older my motivation has changed. I never hated my former job, in fact I loved it. Now I just want a job that is a job and not my life, one that I will like well enough but is more stable.

As I have become older I realize that I worry about leaving the world a better place. I do think about what I can myself do to contribute to a better world. My husband and I have been planning on volunteering for make a wish. We know there is need in eastern Kentucky. The only reason we have not started  as of yet is because we are not sure if we will be staying in Ashland past December. Anyway we plan to start when our relocation plans are sure. I do wonder if this will make any difference at all but I do feel led to do something. I am thankful for my good life and even with its uncertainties it is pretty great. I guess I just feel like if I could help someone else be a little happier even for a while, that it would be a worthwhile thing to do.

Destination vs. Journey?

 Where am I? Where do I want to go? How will I get there? How do I measure my goals?  I am O.K. with where I am at this point, simply because you can not plan life. I can pay my bills, I have a great family, and I am in a position where I can return to school to be trained for a second career. So I guess that is where I am. Returning to school for a new career is where I want to go and how I plan to get there. That is pretty much it. I am used to moving around a bit so that is as far ahead as I can plan. I do not really understand the phrase "how do you measure your goals" I have them and I work toward them same as anyone else. As for if they are long term or short term, lets just say everything is both long term and short term for me. I moved to Ashland less than two months ago thinking that I was here for at least three years. Looks like I will be moving back to Louisville before Christmas. So I do not really plan long term, I like to just keep my options open and see where life takes me. Working toward a second career is a long term goal by simply putting me one step closer to retirement.

The lessons I could teach someone else from my life is to just do the things you want to do. I want to travel, then I make sure to save for it because it is a priority for me. Having a new car or a large house not so much. I think I am happy because I do not let things hold me back. When I lay dying, I will not remember the car but I will remember the expierence I had while seeing the world. Another lession I could teach someone else is how to say no. Just because someone wants you to do something is not a good reason to do it. If feels funny saying no the first few times but after that man is it liberating. In my past when I was younger I never traveled anywhere because I didnt have anyone to go with me. One day I realized that I wasn't getting any younger and life was passing me by that was when I decided to do what I wanted and go where I wanted, and learn to say no.

I devote myself to my and my husbands combined adventrues. There is no way I can list them all because every day is an adventrue. Do not get me wrong we all have bumps in the road, but I choose not to get to hung up  on them because I can not change it anyway. Am I a change artist or a change junkie? I dont know but I am surrounded by change and I must like it.

In Another Class and Temptations vs Aspirations

I am not really sure if I really see many differences between the stories from In Another Class and Temptations vs Aspirations. Really I see more likeness than difference. All of these people have been at some time or another unhappy with their work. They continue that work for finanical compensation. After a while all of their stories just blend into each other to be just one big story.

 I have untill this point in my life rejected all thoughts of switching careers because I really enjoyed what I did. Plenty of people made more money than me but that was ok because I was happy and enjoyed going to work each day. If you have never truly enjoyed your job then you will not understand this but let me tell you that there isnt any amount of money that is worth the feeling of freedom you have when you dont dread going to work.

My life does not fit into either of these sections because I had the job I loved and did well with it for several years. I enjoyed it but I cared to much about it. I am doing the opposite of the people in the book. I have to step away from my old career because it is making me crazy. I never thought I would say this but I just want to get paid reasonably well and know what my paycheck is going to be every week . I want to leave work at work and not think about it untill I go back.

I think most of the people of this book have made no real chane for good or bad in their lifes. To me they stayed about the same, however the person who has made the most change for the better has to be Po. He gets paid to write about people who have midlife crisis. Clearly this is not a real job but here I am reading it and blogging about it.

An Inner Ring

I do not recall I have ever used status as a surrogate for individual expression. I have no status to speak of. The people I choose to surround myself with would never be impressed by anything I had or had achieved.
If anything I care to little what others think of me and I have a saying "it does not matter if you know I am right. I know it and thats all that matters."

I know several people that have more wealth that I most likley ever will, they are unhappy. I know people that live beyond their means. They are unhappy and stressed out because they will never get out from under the debt. I have one friend that works a retail job, lives in a tiny rented shotgun house with her husband and two kids, and drives a 10 year old minvan. She is the happiest person I know. Her children are recpectful of adults, good students, and even as teens pleasant to be around. These are the kind of people that should be role models. They dont care about status and this is why they are happy. If you are lucky to have family and friends that love you well thats the highest status I can think of and the rest is just distraction.

In the story The Umbrella of Freedom, Ana Miyares was a much different character thanTim Bratcher. She moved to a smaller less expensive apartment to take the job she felt strongly about. This is not always easy or even possible to do. Not many people would take a job with less to offer you financially. That is the opposite of what is normal to do. Her decision to do what she felt was best seems crazy to many people but who am I to say it was not the right choice? Maybe her choice to do a job that she felt helped others is all the status she needs.

That Sense of “Rightness...blog 3

Po  says we’re as likely to simply stumble into a place that feels right as arrive there by reasoned planning. This is one of the only things that I have read so far that makes sense. I am a planner, always have been. If I had a dollar for every plan I have made that changed course, well lets just say I would not be sitting here writing this blog. I do not know anyone that has arrived exactly where they planned on, with out at least a little detour along the way, that is if they even had a plan. However, even though my life has not had the turn of events that I expected, and a few disapointments I think that I am where I am ment to be and I believe that I am happier because my plans did not work out.

As a whole I do not really identify with the people from the book but I did like Warren Brown's story about his cakes. I do not believe that we all have to do amazing things to make a difference.I like that he chose to make cakes and keep his successful business in his neighborhood rather than move to a fancy part of town. He gets that it isnt all about money and I like that..

I have no intrest in telling my own story simply because I do not find it that interesting to talk about myself but after reading this book I realize that maybe it is more interesting than I thought. Maybe Po should interview me?

Lacking an off switch

After reading this weeks assignment, it was hard for me to choose which person's story was most like my own.  There was some similarity in most of them.  I think the one that was most similar was Jessica's story, "Lacking an off switch."

The reason this story is most relevant to my own life is that, like Jessica, I had always known what I wanted to do and I have been doing it for many years.  When I graduated high school, I went straight into beauty school.  I knew I wanted to be a hairdresser.  It had always been a hobby and an intrest of mine, so it seemed only natural.  For a long time I loved my job.

However, as time has passed, I have become disenchanted with it.  I am still very passionate about it, but the practicality in that line of work has burned out for me.  It is time for a change.  It took me a very long time to figure out what that change would be, but I think nursing will be a good fit for me.

First Post

 I have been a hair dresser for several years and until recently, I have always loved it.  It was my passion.  I could wake up every day and look forward to the day ahead.  I truly enjoyed my job.

After getting married, I moved to a new place.  I had to find a new salon.  For those of you who don't know, for a hair dresser, a new city means starting over.  It means building a new clientelle and trying to start rebuilding from the ground up.  I ended up finding a job in corporate chain, which I absolutely hate.  But, the pay scale was good and they were very busy.  I liked several of the girls I worked with there, so that was a plus, but then the corporate non-sense would kick in and I would hate it again.  The manager got fired and the new manager was great.  I actually started to love my job again.  But, my husband was in the military, so it was time to move again. 

This time, I landed a job in a small, individually owned salon and I loved it.  The owners made some bad decisions and the money wasn't good, but I made some close friends and the atmosphere was easy.  Then, unexpectedly, it was time to move yet again.

This time, I ended up in another individual owned salon.  The girls were really nice, the pay was good, and the atmosphere was good.  At least, it was good until the owner would come in.  Most of the time she was gone and it was nice.  Then she started coming around more.  She decided that the salon wasn't making enough money.  She got rid of the cleaning service and told the hair dressers we had to do the cleaning after our shifts.  This doesn't go over well with commisioned employees.  She also told us that if we took too long on a hair cut, she would dock our pay.  I had had enough.  I told her that I was not going to be her free maid and pointed out to her that the pay deductions she was implementing were illegal in that state (which was true).   She didn't take kindly to that.  The next day I had a voice mail saying my services were no longer required.

All of this, and some other things, have made me bitter.  It is time for a career change. 

What should I do with my life?  We shall see!